Hanging out with God

Since our move to Germany, I (Cathy) have been exploring this idea of what it means to enjoy the presence of God, to be in God's presence, to truly understand that the God of the universe loves me and wants to be in relationship with me. You would like at my life stage, the length of time that I've walked with God, this wouldn't be something I would be pondering. Yet, this is something that I have struggled with getting my arms around for most of my life -- what does it mean to be in God's presence? Is it spending 15 minutes in prayer, having a daily quiet time, singing to Him -- what does it mean to be in God's presence througout the day, throughout my journey.

I decided to read a couple of books that had been recommended to me: He Loves Me, by Wayne Jacobsen, The Practice of the Presence of God, by Brother Lawrence and Enjoying the Presence of God, by Jan Johnson. What I am learning is that I truly struggle with the fear of not knowing if God truly loves me. I mean, I know the right things to say. I know the Bible and I "know" that God loves me. For Heaven's Sake, that's what Christianity is about. Jesus enduring the cross so that I could be reconciled with God and enter into a relationship with Him. But, I'm still struggling with sin, I'm still very selfish, I choose TV over worship - I do wonder if He is tried of putting up with me. I try to stay busy to prove to myself that I'm worthy of love.

These books I've read have me meditating on this issue and grappling with the truth that God loves us and ME no matter what. Jan Johnson puts it this way God's love tackles us, telling us that we can quit asking what we must do to be loved and valued because His answer is NOTHING. I'm pondering this concept that He loves me and values me - no matter what I do, no matter what I don't do.

I don't have this figured out yet and probably never will this side of Heaven; but, I'm excited to be thinking about what it would mean to slow down and be quiet and reflect on God. How freeing it would be to truly understand that the things I do, I do to bring glory to God and not to try and earn His love. I'm considering what things truly refresh my soul and when I feel most loved by God: listening to music, laughing with my sister, praying with my beloved Lou or curling up with a good book. I'm thrilled to be on this journey, I don't know where it will lead, but I do desire to know Jesus as the dear Friend that I've longed for - I can't want to see how I learn to spend time with God all day.

Christmas in Germany

We had a joyous & special Christmas season. Our daughter, Katie, was able to join us for a few weeks. We had a fun time exploring a few things in Germany with her and exposing her to our ministry. She made some new friends -- not surprising with her friendly personality.

We explored some sights with Katie, primarily a lot of castles & Christmas markets. Here are a few that we really enjoyed.

As we approached the Christmas celebration, we planned a fun excursion with folks from the Hospitality House. We took about 20 folks to Rothenburg and Nurenberg for a weekend. Rothenburg is known for being Germany's best-preserved medieval walled town. It has some fun and interesting sights, like the Medieval Crime & Punishment Muserum, a walk along the city wall, and a beautiful Christmas market. Nurenberg is know for its medieval architecture, the biggest Christmas market in Germany, the tiniest bratwurst in Germany and its Nazi past. Folks spent time in the Nazi Documentation Center and explored the Christmas market. It was a fun weekend and we shared our time with the Baumholder Hospitality House as well.

On Christmas Eve, we began our celebration at the Ramstein Comtemporary Service (RCS) for a candlelight worship service. We had a nice dinner at home and had our family Christmas celebration with Katie. Christmas morning began with about 16 singles coming over for brunch. We fixed eggs, pancakes, bacon, all the fixins. Afterwards, they opened their presents. Many came in their pajamas to enjoy the morning. We moved into the afternoon with a Christmas dinner planned at 3:00. We hosted 81 folks as we celebrated the birth of our Lord. We had a time of worship and singing carols, followed by playing games and hanging out! We hope everyone truly felt like they were at home.

We feel like we are settling into life in Germany and a routine with ministry. We are excited to see what God will do in 2010. We continue to work on deeping our relationships with folks that are in our ministry. We hope you and your family had a blessed Christmas.

November was a blur!

We can't believe that it is already December! November just flew by. We had a busy month as we began to get ready for the holidays. We attended our first Cadence European Staff Conference. We enjoyed spending time with our team and encouraging one another in our ministries. We dealt with the tragedy of the Ft. Hood shootings, death of a Chaplain here in our Ramstein community, people deploying to Afghanistan, family deaths and dealing with loneliness as the holidays approach. Yet, as Thanksgiving came, we were thankful.

We celebrated with 74 folks at our home. We played games together, enjoyed lots of turkey & pie and learning more about each other. Lou & I reflected on how much we appreciate this opportunity God has given us to serve the men and women that participate in our ministry. We have grown to love and care for each one in a very special way. Our prayer is that we will continue to deepen our relationships with them as we move into 2010.

As December begins, we are busy with activities and getting ready to usher in the celebration of the birth of our Lord Jesus. It is hard to believe but this will be our first Christmas in 48 years (second for Lou) that we haven't spent it with our families. Yet, we are honored to try and create a home away from home for those people here that will not be able to spend - yet another - Christmas with their family.

We started the Christmas season by going to the Tubingen Chocolate Festival and Stuttgart Christmas Market. We spent the day with about 15 folks eating chocolate from various parts of Europe, sharing our hearts as we walked through the Christmas market in Stuttgart and just hanging out!

We are thrilled to have an opportunity to share our lives with these folks! We can't wait to see what God teaches us during this Christmas season. May we never forget the miracle that the creator of the universe chose to leave Heaven, come to reconcile us with Him through the birth of Jesus, His death & resurrection. God calls us to respond to this truth -- how will you respond this Christmas?

Approaching 3 months....

We cannot believe that we have been in Germany almost three months. In some ways, it has gone by very fast; in others, very slow. Since it's been over a month since our last update, we have been busy - thus life is going fast. Yet, as we struggle to find our groove with ministry, our patience is being tried - thus life is going slow. We want to settle into life, settle into ministry, get past the transition phase. We want to obey God's leading in our ministry, yet when there is pushback from folks, we question if we are "hearing the Lord accurately". In all honesty, our emotions have been all over the map, especially for Cathy.

Change is always an interesting thing. Some people are open to the change in leadership and allowing us to do things differently than our predecessors. Some people want things to not change at all and are upset with the fact that we aren't Fred & Diane. We understand that, we want to be sensitive to that, but we also know we need to be who God has gifted and called us to be.

We are excited about how the fall has played out and looking forward to the holidays. We did have really had a good October. We had our first excursion with the folks from the House. We went to the Sunshine Pumpkin Farm near Landstuhl. We went and toured the farm, picked a pumpkin, had a BBQ back at the House and finished with a pumpkin carving party. It was really a lot of fun!

Lou managed to turn 48 this month. To celebrate, we went to visit the Vincenza House in northern Italy. Our friends, Steve & Teeter Mauldin, are filling in at the Hospitallity House, so we went to hang out and enjoy a quick tour of Venice.

We spent four days with the Mauldin's. Two days were seeing how the Vincenza Hospitality House operates, and picking their brains about doing ministry. We sent two days being tourists in Venice. It was a fun time!

We are so grateful that we serve a God who comes along side us, who uses us, who loves us: despite our fears and insecurities. We are so thankful for friends and family that love us, support us, pray for us. We miss everyone so much, but are thrilled to be here. We are excited to see what God has in store for us and the folks we are doing life with -- we'll be in touch!

Krazy K-town!

We have been in Kaiserslautern for six weeks now. We can't believe how quickly time has flown. Sad to say that we have not been able to keep up with regular communication since our arrival. Some of you may know, we have been without internet connectivity since we have arrived. We finally got it hooked up yesterday (24 Sept). Without internet, we have been surprised how much that has affected our transition.

We have been reflecting on the importance of communication. When you don't feel like you can chat with people, connect at a heart level (even if it's through an email), the end result is you are isolated and lonely. At least that is how it has been for us. Isn't that true in all of our relationships? Whether it is a phone call, a chat over coffee, reading an email, you feel like you are connecting. We are made for relationship. Relationship with our God and with each other.

We truly appreciate everyone encouraging us and praying for us. We are starting to feel like we are getting into a groove with our ministry. Tuesday night, Lou leads a men's study and Cathy cooks for 15-20 guys. Lou is facilitating a character study on David. Friday night, we host a dinner and a study for about 80 folks. After a time of worship, we are viewing the video series by Francis Schaeffer, titled How Should We Then Live? and Lou leads a discussion afterwards. We are hopeful that this series will challenge folks to truly look at their world view and come to a true understanding of why they believe what they believe.

Fall has yet to start here in Germany. Mornings are cool, but for the past week or so, it's been sunny and in the 70's. Very unusual -- at least that's what we have been told. We will be sending more regular updates, along with video updates. We are excited to be hear and grateful to you all who have loved us, encouraged us, supported us.

We are own our way!

Can't believe it! We are on our way to Kaiserslautern. Lou leaves on Monday, 10 August, with our dog Bailey. Cathy leaves on Wedneday, 12 August, with her mother. Her mom has graciously agreed to come out for a few weeks to help us get settled, paint/wallpaper a few rooms, unpack and get the house ready to go!

Our goods shipped about a month ago. We had a great group of guys agree to sacrifice their day and help us load a 20'x10'x8' foot container. The container was supposed to arrive at 8:30 and we were initially told we would have two (2) hours to pack it up. Unfortunately, the container didn't show up until 11:30. Because of the delay, the shipping company gave us more time to pack it up.

Our crew was ready to go at 8:30, but due to the delay, we were creative in how we killed our time. Lou's brother, Vince, decided to challenge Andrew Hess to a "chipping" competion. Katie and Jessica decided to tackle some Trivial Pursuit, which Andrew ended up joining in the game as well.

Finally, the container showed up and we worked hard to get all of our goods packed. We had a great team, but Clint Mahan was instrumental in getting it packed so everything would be get to Germany. We are so grateful to all that helped us! It is scheduled to arrive on Wednesday, 19 August. Hopefully, it will arrive with everything still in tact! :-)

We are very excited and a little sad. We are saying our good-byes to our family this weekend, which will be very hard. We appreciate all of your love, friendship and support! We'll be in touch again, after we get settled in K-town.

Make me patient

I call to you, O Lord, from my quiet darkness. Show me your mercy and love. Let me see your face, hear your voice, touch the hem of your cloak. I want to love you, be with you, speak to you and simply stand in your presence. But I cannot make it happen. Pressing my eyes against my hands is not praying, and reading about your presence is not living in it. But there is that moment in which you will come to me, as you did to your fearful disciples, and say, "Do not be afraid; it is I." Let that moment come soon, O Lord. And if you want to delays it, then make me patient. -- From A Cry for Mercy by Henri J.M. Nouwen

As we prepare to leave in two weeks for Germany, we realize that we are truly struggling with mixed emotions. We are starting to feel the pressure of the enemy and are wrestling with being impatient, fearful, nervous. At the same time, our confidence in what God has called us to do fills our hearts with joy & excitement. We are about to embark on the biggest change and adventure of our lives. Some times we feel God's presence in our lives in amazing ways; other times we are in a quiet darkness.

We can relate to Nouwen's cry. We know God is with us, even when we feel alone. We know that God hears the cry of our hearts, even when we don't feel His presence. We will continue to cling to the Lord and know we will have that moment with the Creator of the universe where we hear him say, "Do not be afraid; it is I".