Friday, November 4, 2011

Reflections on turning 50!

Lou & I both turned 50 this year! Unbelievable, where does the time go? When I turned 40, I could see myself turning 80. I know that sounds silly, but it brought some comfort to know that I was not quite "over the hill". It was my way of rationalizing getting older.

Now that I'm 50, I do have a hard time seeing myself turn 100. So, the realization that I'm in the latter part of my life has hit me. Don't get me wrong, I'm not discouraged over this. I am thankful for good health and hoping to age gracefully. My forties were my best decade to date; so who knows what will happen in my 50's!

I have been evaluating what have I done so far with my life and what will I do with the remaining days I have. This has struck me more so in the past few weeks as I have been walking through the valley of greif again. I know that God numbers my days, but it becomes more real when you lose someone. [At least it does for me]. Jessica was only 18 when God called her home; Chris was only 27. How many more days do I have before I go home?

I don't have any answers yet to any of these questions. But, I am clinging to the truth that God has ordered my steps; God will never leave me and is faithful; and God will never hide from me, no matter how dark my journey seems. I have made some mistakes in my first 50 years and I will make some more mistakes in the next 50 years. But, as I continue to grow older, my desire is to serve God and bring Him glory with my life, love Lou & my family with all my heart, support my friends as they walk through life and to finish the race well.

Please continue to keep my family in your thoughts and prayers as we move into the holiday season. It will be difficult since Jessica won't be here to celebrate with us. Yet, we have confidence that she is celebrating and enjoying her eternal life and we cannot wait to see her again soon.